2018 Reflections to Carry into 2019

Happy New Year! Well, at the time of writing this post we’re now three days into the new year. How are those resolutions holding up? We’ve done well so far, and today the hubby and I made vision boards! Woop, woop! I’ve never done one before, but we did them at the same time, so it was almost like a date. (It helped that the kiddos were napping.) We spent an hour talking over our short- and long-term goals from a personal, family and business perspective and another hour putting the boards together. 

Unfortunately, the girls woke from their naps, spoiling my hubby time and making me realize I hadn’t started my chicken tortilla soup yet. 😮 Oops. No big deal for them, since all they eat is mac n’ cheese and chicken nuggets. Before I knew it, it was 7:20 p.m., time to put the girls to bed, and Pat and I still hadn’t eaten dinner. Well, the crockpot was taking entirely too long, so I threw everything in the Instant Pot (or IP as us cult members like to call it). Pat believes if you get one you’re forced into a cult of IPers, and he’s not far off. 😉 You need to join the cult to be able to use the darn thing, or find a friend who’s an expert and has all the time in the world to teach you.  

Once the IP was done, guess who got an opportunity for a second date? We did! It was 8 p.m. when we sat down to eat. In typical husband fashion, Pat also called out that my chicken tortilla soup was really just “soup,” since I failed to buy tortilla chips. It must not have been too horrible because he had seconds. So, we enjoyed hot “soup” and talked uninterrupted, all thanks to our vision boards. 😉 

Anywho, in the midst of this holiday season chaos, I found time to reflect on 2018. My hope is that in me sharing my reflections you will find your focus for 2019. It’s not too late! 

2018 was downright humbling for me, to say the least. I started the year off strong, doing a lot of marketing for our real estate investing company, while managing to pull off the stay-at-home mama and housewife gigs, but I felt like a failure. I wasn’t able to give my typical 110 percent to anything. I wasn’t being the rock star mama or wife I knew I was, and I certainly wasn’t getting far with the real estate business. For every real estate call made or sent letter, at least two of the three people who’d respond were nasty, grumpy pants, which just further buried my ego below layers of defeat. At home I felt like a chicken with my head cut off. There weren’t enough hours in the day to accomplish it all, and I didn’t have childcare five days a week. Don’t get me wrong, the two breaks I get from the grandmamas every week are a blessing, but it wasn’t enough. I knew I wasn’t a failure, but it sure as heck felt like it. 

Oftentimes it’s easy to get wrapped around the axle because we’re looking ahead, so we can live for the future; however, in the midst of working for the future we forget to live in the present. There are so many little things we take for granted, and it’s always the simple things that bring us the most joy, at least that’s what I’ve found in my 36 years. I think Lao Tzu, a Chinese philosopher, said it best, “If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.” So, in this crazy society, how do we force ourselves to be present and stop focusing on the future? 

I took my thoughts from 2018, and we will continue to implement them in 2019, even more so actually. Below I delve into four takeaways, and I will follow up with another post discussing the last four.  

Know your priorities, and stick to them. My biggest priority is my kiddos, and I am only willing to sacrifice so much time with them. I enjoy being a real estate professional, but my kids will only need me for so much longer, and I am blessed to have the opportunity to stay home with them. Yes, even when my three-year-old decides to mix her spit with chalk and color on her bed frame. I need to write a thank you note to Clorox for making disinfecting wipes – they’re great for cleaning up Pookie’s latest spit-themed artwork.

Don’t force a square peg into a round hole. If what you’re trying to do is causing more stress and internal turmoil then change your approach. I believe you are exactly where you need to be at this moment, and of course, you can alter your path, but if it causes you to lose sight of your priorities, or it leads to unhappiness, then reevaluate. I am not saying to quit, but search for a different route. It may not land you exactly where you thought you wanted to be, but it could land you where you’re supposed to be.

After numerous months of defeat with our fix and flip business, Pat and I decided to pursue out-of-state rental properties versus trying to find homes in Colorado to rehab. The housing market in recent years has been ridiculous, especially in Colorado. If you found a home here in 2018 and moved in, then consider yourself lucky. We reevaluated and rerouted ourselves and found success with rentals. 

Chunk out your time and tasks, and make it happen! If you want to get stuff done, plot your week on Sundays, and review your schedule each evening before bed in case things have shifted. I also suggest 30-minute increments, and if you end up getting ahead of schedule that day then that’s your time…your time to do whatever you please. Don’t use those extra minutes for more work; use them for something truly enjoyable. Romance novel? Why the heck not?

Thanks to Hal Elrod’s “The Miracle Morning” we’ve also been waking up an hour earlier Monday through Friday to go through his “miracle morning” routine. Wow! What a difference. Yes, waking up super early sucks, but we’re using our time for what he calls the life SAVERS: Silence (or Prayer), Affirmations, Visualizations, Exercise, Reading and Scribing, and it gives your daily routine more purpose. This is why we also created our vision boards. They help put everything in front of us, so we’re focused and know what to visualize and think about. Admit it, in your older age you have started forgetting within a matter of seconds what you set off to do, right? So why not create something that will be in front of you reminding you of your bigger goals? 

It takes commitment and likely an accountability partner or something that will force accountability…like a triathlon, perhaps. Pat and I briefly discussed doing one, and then he came home from work one day saying, “Hey, I signed us up for a triathlon in June.” Surpriiiiiiiiissse. 

Stop comparing yourself to others! I can’t stress this enough. Just stop! It is so easy to say, I know, but it’s so important that you hear it. She’s skinny; I am a cow. She’s preggers; I am not. She looks beautiful; I have kid slobber and spit up on my shirt. She’s making money; I am folding laundry. She gets to stay home with her kids; I just got yelled at by my boss and missed my kid’s game. We all do it, but rather than comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to you. I dare you to outdo yourself. Focus on being the best version of yourself for where you presently are in life. Guess what…you’re likely not going to look like you did back in the day, but you can work at getting what your mama gave you into better shape. “Work it; own it.”

I hope you enjoyed these first four reflections. What were some of your biggest takeaways from 2018? Please share, so we can all grown and learn from one another.